The Radical Notion That All Life Should Be Valued & That Truth Will Prevail

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

is it worth it?

So this is kind of a personal topic and all, but it has been on my mind lately. I'm not ashamed of the fact that I am a virgin or even a 'good' girl but sometimes people make me feel like it's something wrong. That it's wrong to be a 'good' girl and I don't know why I let them make me feel that way.

I dislike how if I don't drink they try to pressure me into drinking. Why is that? I'm not pressuring them not to drink. I'm not telling them not to- I just respectfully decline the pro-offered alcoholic drink. Why don't they respect my decision not to drink? I mean, first off, I am underage and I do not believe that minors should be drinking so why would I? Secondly, I have absolutely no desire to drink Whatsoever. Is that odd? Because people make it seem like that's odd...

The other thing is, I am virgin- as I stated above- and I have never even kissed a guy. I know, wow! lol. Now, please, don't go and think that nobody's ever tried to kiss me. Haha. Guys have, I've pulled away. Why, you may ask? Because I guess I still hold onto my young girl's fantasty of waiting for my wedding to kiss for the first time. Actually, I'm not gonna lie, I haven't found a guy I wanna kiss. I hold onto the belief that kissing is quite special; that each kiss you give is givng away a part of yourself. I don't want to regret my first kiss- and if I were to just kiss any guy that I feel an attraction to, I would regret it. I know myself, and I know I would.

Just recently someone asked me if I'm a virgin, and I said yes. He asked if it's because I haven't found the right guy. How to explain it to have him understand? I wasn't sure. Nobody nowadays seem to understand or grasp the concept of waiting for marriage. I replied with "I'm waiting for I guess you could say it's because I haven't found the right guy." I mean, that's true. I haven't found the right guy, the one I'm going to marry. But even when I do find that guy, he's not getting in my pants til our wedding night.

If I were to give away my virginity before marriage- just like if I were to give away my first kiss- I would regret it. In fact, I would probably hate myself. I want to live a full, fun life. But I don't want to look back and see regrets tainting it.

Of course, others believe once you find "the one" it's ok to have sex with him; after all you're going to get married. I don't buy into that. I mean, if you're going to marry him anyway, why not just wait a little longer? They say if you love him it's ok to have sex. Again, I don't buy that. Because nowadays the word love is so misused, so more than likely the love you two feel is just "I love you right now but I probably won't a little later down the road." There is no commitment with that love.

And that's about it, I guess. But if you're like me, the good girl, keep at it. Don't let others make you feel bad for being "good". If you don't wanna drink, it's ok. Don't wanna have sex, it's ok. Don't wanna smoke? Again, it's ok. Don't give in because people think you're weird. You're unique, and don't let anyone make you feel guilty for it.

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